Sunday, May 1, 2016

MAY 2016

First  fragrant creamy stars open
enticing winged nectar seekers
plump bumble bee cannot resist olive's
scented offer eagerly she dives deep 
soon sporting yellow knickers  
she nuzzles each star again and again
heavily loaded she takes to the air
bumbling home with her gathered treasure
on this beautiful first day of May

Pines in bloom
shimmering gold dust


Sitting completely still
nearly unreal yet feathers stir
now in the slight breeze
he's full of life so elegant
able to soar high above his world
his keen eyes able to survey all
his strident call carried on the wind
once he rises high into the sky again
clumsy and earthbound... we can only dream

Mother's Day Blues


I was un-mothered in many ways
in turn I too did not do my very
best at mothering struggling
through a young doomed marriage
trying to raise a child while
desperately trying to keep my
 personal world from unraveling
young alone and oh so unready
six thousand miles from home
among strangers and strange ways
still carrying that old guilt
of opportunities missed for the
sad cycle to end with me therefore
Mother's Day can feel heavy for
me as I read tender proclamations
of love touching memories of
perfect motherhood given and
received such deep connections
forged and tended tenderly
but do not feel sad for me
for as I've grown older I've
chosen to forgive both myself
and those who did their best
under less then perfect conditions
now I make those connections it's
my choice to pick up and weave together
those torn strands allowing us to
move forward connecting for the time
remaining to us learning to be tolerant
learning to move on past old hurts
mending the tattered cloak of loss and
disappointment patching large holes
thankfully today's only angry feelings
came when the flowers I ordered would
not find her on time for Mother's Day
yet picking up the phone sharing
the dismal news resulted in more
strands being woven as first outrage
then laughter at the crazy situation
resulted in more strands being woven
leaving us both smiling and cheered
making up for lost time it's never too late
Today's lesson
on this Mother's Day
I am not alone

Living sculpture
osprey and dove side by side
living in peace

On Motherhood
Sometimes it seems as if animals
by some seen lesser than ourselves
have a much better grip on parenthood
they go by instinct only it seems
always moving forward teaching lessons
knowing that this will offer the best
chance for their little one's survival
rarely do they seem uncertain never
bombarded by opinions books and other
complications they just parent the
way nature asks of them if only humans
would have more of that gift often with
us motherhood given or received seems
wrought with possible minefields and painful
memories of rejection carried forward
though even in the animal kingdom
at times there can be an aberration
maternal instinct lacking leaving those
in their care abandoned sometimes even
dead as young inexperienced mothers under
severe stress might feel overwhelmed
rejecting or even killing their young
then moving forward away from the scene
of the crime untouched by what they
left behind maybe starting over again
surely they were reared by good mothers
raising them to successful adulthood
which makes me wonder....what went wrong??

Each day we check the Linden tree
bees and I slowly circling looking
for that first bud oozing nectar
Bumble Bee fell asleep waiting
cocooned in tender young leaves and sunshine


Beneath glowering skies
revealing their colorful hearts
Lilies laugh out loud


Could my fascination with Luna
lie in her gentle comforting light
steady never flickering even when she slips
away out of sight now and then still I know
she is there on most nights her bright
steady gaze lighting up even the dark
corners where eerie shadows often lurk
branches snap loudly outside the window
uneasy thoughts drift heavily into
their favorite cozy dark night places
worries which cleverly followed me to bed
now wake me sitting heavily on my chest
rudely staring down as I toss and turn
her soothing pale light scares away all of
that her bright rays illuminate even the darkest
corners showing  me clearly there was nothing
to be feared after all I smile reassured once
again closing my eyes knowing that even while
dreaming she will watch over me never flickering...

 Waiting patiently
sitting out in the heat
deep in thought
why does he drive away
leaving me behind feeling bereft
ears pinned back listening
not hearing the familiar hum
every minute gone is one too long
where is he my adored two legged one???


First light trembles through leaves
beneath partially cloudy skies
iridescent jewels dive hover
high pitched angry squeaks
fill this morning's cool air
aerial battles ensue precision
flying maneuvers too swift
to follow with my sleepy eyes
they settle briefly ascend again
morning battle at the feeder
rubbing sleep from my eyes
turning I stumble into the kitchen
even before brewing our tea
syrup must be replenished the hungry
battalion drains feeders nearly as
swiftly as they fly soon first
golden rays pierce morning clouds
still they sip whirr sip whirr
watching hand cradling my cup
bedazzled by tiny jeweled warriors

Waning yet still she glows
deep fire smoldering
scorching dark night skies